How often do you get caught up in struggling to find an answer, even saying to yourself, “I should know this by now?” When we are in the midst of a life challenge, it sure feels overwhelming… Like it will never end… that we will never figure it out…

When we were 20, we had lots of things that we thought we knew… lots of things that we knew we didn’t know… Looking back we can see that we are more than capable of embracing our life experiences from a powerful place of learning and growth.

I recently asked my readers what they know now that they didn’t know when they were 20. Here is what they said. As you read the responses below, not only embrace a trust in yourself that you are capable of amazing growth, also take a moment to thank that 20 year old with in you for all that she taught you.

What do you know now that you didn’t know when you were 20?…

• That I like hot sauce on my eggs
• That I’m an empath
• That I would move to California in 2009 and turn my life upside down for the best!
• That I actually DON’T know everything, and probably never will!
• That I would move to Florida from NY and get stuck in this dumb ass town! (sorry but feeling disgusted right now)
• That it’s okay not to know everything (but I may need to be reminded of that again tomorrow!)
• Where do I start?
• Its only been 3yrs… but so much. Life changes on a day to day basis, nothing is permanent, and Ive got to wake up every day with a smile no matter what =D Life is something to permanently be worked on.
• How to love myself!
• Lol, not everybody’s problem is mine!
• That I have the choice to do anything I want!
• That you are not forever young, but by growing older you do become wiser!
• what I’m actually capable of
• I am capable of a lot more than I think.
• Thank God, as I got older, and through the “School of Hard Knocks” and experience, have achieved many goals. Independent and knowledgeable, I have empathy for others, and unafraid of new challenges!
• I can say no and mean it
• I am able recognize obstacles in my life, valuate them, and also manage to go past them.
• I was never as fat as I thought I was
• I did not know as much as I thought I did.
• That I have the ability to do anything!!
• That I can’t do everything!
• That there really is a lot more I can do with the right mindset
• That my body image meter was way off..
• that I am somebody!
• That I have a passion for Pregnant Teen’s and seeing them succeed in life.
• I didn’t know who I was! I was clueless. I now know I am a child of God created for His purpose! I know that I am beautifully and wonderfully made. My self-esteem back then was horrible. I was depressed and truly did not enjoy life. I love life now! Thanks!!!
• That I am alive. That I could leave that abusive relationship and raise a child
• How strong I really am and and through that, how much empathy and compassion I have.
• inner strength, resilience
• What a good question! Not to be so attached to how I thought my life needed to play out. That the hills and dips are all part of the amazing journey.
• That if I can dream it, I can do it!

© 2010 copyright. Susan Liddy, AspireLifeCoaching.org. All rights reserved.

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What do YOU know now that you didn’t know when you were 20?…

We all had hopes and dreams growing up. Do you remember being a little girl, dreaming of your future? What dreams did you have and what did you want to be when you grew up? Here are how some of you responded…

• What did you want to be when you grew up?
• Olivia Newton John. lol.
• Physical Therapist
• YOUNGER!! LOL
• happy.
• nurse
• a vet
• I don’t even remember!
• I think an artist.
• A singer since I was 2
• A teacher
• A fighter pilot.
• My daughter wanted to be a pink flower :0)
• A vet..
• a veterinarian and a mommy!
• A pediatrician
• a lawyer
• the president and a teacher
• an artist or a paleontologist
• A Fortune Teller
• a doctor (psychiatrist or psychologist)
• A teacher.
• A teeeeecheeer!!
• A mommy
• a doctor
• psychologist..
• just the person i already am
• At what age? Grade school = artist; high school = lawyer. (I ended up doing business/finance & not happy now… Wonder if that has anything to do with it.)
• I wanted to be a missionary~ little girl … and then I wanted to be a cultural anthropologist~ teenage
• You mean after telephone operator and dog shelter lady? LIBRARIAN!!!! And it’s been a great career for me.
• a mother!
• a vet… teacher….. healer as a teen and to found a children’s orphanage in south america
• I remember l was always ready for that one…air hostess….but l kinda lost that dream along the way…dont know why…
• A ballerina. An architect. A high school English teacher. But I realized none of them really suited my free-spirited whimsical nature — now I am a mom, business partner and part-time supervisor at a Levi’s store. :c) Overall, I’m pretty happy about the choices I made.
• A Marine Biologist and work with Jacques Cousteau.
• A kindergarten teacher
• Happy
• Like my Dad!
• A teacher
• A Nurse
• a stay at mom and a veterinarian
• A Mother
• Professional Baseball Player
• A writer.
• a lawyer
• I don’t know yet. I have studied Fashion Merchandising, studied Canadian Law, even learned how to operate a front end Loader and how to drive a Tractor Trailer.
• Veterinarian, Marine Biologist or Ambulance Officer. I was told 2 / 3 (latter) had little / no opportunities for Women. That has all changed. I chose to challenge myself in the corporate world surround by people i could learn from and nurture! I loved it! Now at home and ready for a new adventure!
• A teacher. And a mother. I was both for 12 years. Now I stay at home full-time and love it.

© 2010 copyright. Susan Liddy, AspireLifeCoaching.org. All rights reserved.

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Comment on this question: what did YOU want to be when you grew up?

Beauty pageants have been a part of our history and culture for a long time. Lately, there has been controversy around contestants and specifically, what they do when they are not strutting their stuff on the pageant stage. Whether or not you agree that what happens outside the pageant should stay there, what do you think of beauty pageants in general?

I asked my readers this question: “What do you think of beauty pageants like Miss America and Miss USA?” Here is how some of them responded…

• Personally I think they are out dated and they don’t make any sense to me!
• I actually like the Miss World & Miss Universe pageants. . . to see what other countries “see” as outward beauty. Just for fun!
• I prefer the Mister version
• I think they’re stupid and sexist. should be banned
• I actually love Beauty Pageants.. Seeing how each wonderful ladies represents their countries culture, etc.. If only women today could be so graceful and lady-like in their everyday lives!
• The display is one of integrity and deep pride for ones culture, so I’ve never looked at the Beauty Pageants as sexist, stupid.. or in anyway negative, but for what it was intended for.. entertainment and the promotion of ‘positive role modeling of good values every women/ladies should possess— or at least attributes to have!!
  Outdated and irrelevant
• A contest created from the male dominated society that formulates and affirms supposed “key” characteristics of a successful woman – physical beauty solely.
• Not healthy role models to kids/ young women.
• they are sexing it up which racy photos in order to promote something I could care less about.
• Yikes. Sensitive issue.I never watch it. It doesn’t seem interesting.
• If I were a man or a lesbian, I might watch just because it’s a lot of pretty girls.
• I cannot believe they still have that sexist idea on television
• true beauty goes far beyond the surface…
• Each to their own…
• if it makes them happy and gives a sense of achievement then good on them )
• I can’t express myself honestly on this topic without using a lot of bad language! LOL Seriously, I think it’s yet another example of objectification of women. Not in the least bit surprised that “racy pics” of the new Miss USA surfaced. Not at all surprised that “sex tapes” surfaced on last year’s runner up. There’s got to be a better way of obtaining scholarships than parading around in a swimsuit – or posing for Victoria’s Secret-like photos.
• Tawdry, cheap and tacky it is, just like the man who runs the event.

© 2010 copyright. Susan Liddy, AspireLifeCoaching.org. All rights reserved.

Comment on this question:

What is your opinion of beauty pageants?

Wow! Wouldja just look at all these smiles!!! Looks like we all have reasons to feel happy!

Here are your answers to my question: “What do you have to smile about today?”

• I am alive and healthy.
• Over coming a 12yr relationship and still in my right mind.
• Everything.
• My happy & healthy Family, the air I breathe, the rain, the food I eat.
• My long lost classmates, family and other friends on FB,That I am able to work from home on a nice, rainy day.
• Going into the studio to create.
• Doing laundry on a rainy day and watching an old movie.
• Peaceful time for personal growth journey.
• My work day passed very quick, got up full of energy this morning and have still a bit left to do something useful later. (study or get going with my Empowerment bootcamp, hehehe)
• My little daughter say it again, that, me is her best friend
• a puppy in my lap, a great session with a client, my daughter skipping down the front walk with flowers for me in her hand…
• my life!
• smiling at the sunshine, my daughter laughing and my sister
• seeing old friends!
• I’m here, and i’m healthy!
• Great day with a great team of positive people
• A nice sunny day along the beach ,Its bring lots of smile for the FL.community….so go grab ur beach boys cd and lets go surfing!!!!
• you
• My precious grandson, Brandon Delano, his middle name is after my son Del, that died at 17 from cancer.He is such a blessing.
• Running in the rain!!! =)
• Lunch in the park with my son and my youngest helping me with the dishes, turning it into a science lesson!
• My children laughing!
• Almost everything
• my child story
• The beautiful spring weather in arizona!
• Poppin in to see a very brave young man who is out of hospital after a very bad motorbike accident in which he broke his back!!!…………and he is walking……INSPIRED!!! )
• ♥ went to a funeral today which reminded me to be grateful for the gift of life on this earth
• My children and my new job and new life Ive started for us!
• My life has taken a 360 Degrees turn today!
• living & loving
• Today is a balmy, fine autumn day.
• A slight breeze is blowing, my family are together and healthy and I am enjoying having a quiet house to myself as kids are at school, hubby at work, the washing and floors are done and its my day off work…..;)
• I feel spoiled and savor every moment.
• everything!
• Caring friendships and support all around me!
• a mute button on my hearing aids
• just about everything!
• my life

© 2010 copyright. Susan Liddy, AspireLifeCoaching.org. All rights reserved.

Comment on this question:

What do YOU have to smile about today?

When the going gets tough, the tough get…

• Exercising!
• Inspired!
• You keep on going
• Sleepy! haha
• tougher!!!
• going….
• optimistic!
• Out to bed and show the world how to be strong!!!
• …hopeful, determined and courageous.
• diligent.
• on their knees!
• Wiser.
• to figuring out how to solve the trouble…
• determined………and …..to the shops…….
• Real!
• tough
• Get busy!
• Creative.
• Stronger…
• The tough make things happen!
• Persistent! A good mindset and determination is a good recipe for tough times!
• say, this to will pass!
• Silly.
• tired and take a nap and then GO!
• tougher!
• pizza
• centered and smart!
• … Out on the trail for a run!
• Remembering that every day is a chance to do something differently, to experience something differently…enjoying the blessings of now, breathing in every moment and keep looking forward with great anticipation…there is always HOPE!

• Being Happy!
• Funny, I just did a quote from Anita Roddick about Passion being the driving force of success… I think it’s key! I know I feel passionate about my work and it’s clear you do too Susan…
• Seeing your goals come to live and feeling comfortable in your skin
• I agree with Dianne that passion is important. Being accomplished in work that you are passionate about.
• It changes every day. Sometimes it is getting out of bed others it is getting ahead!
• good health, rewarding relationships, enough money for quality living & choices, and lots of JOY JOY JOY
• going to bed happy with my accomplishments of the day and waking up excited for the new day to begin. Having my children grow into fine adults will be my ultimate success.
• breaking free from what everyone expects me to do, and doing what i want to do instead.
• Living an authentic life and embracing possibilities.
• i feel successful when i can speak up for myself and just be who i am.
• Feeling good about myself.
• Through failure!
• Being able to smile and feel good about who I am and how I am living. That seems like success to me.
• Raising good children who will one day do great things.
• Being able to feel good about what I accomplish, no matter what the outcome.
• Caring deeply for yourself, discovering your innate and developed talents and using those talents and your energy to make a positive difference in others’ lives.
• How many time you get up after you fall. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.( I lost my son to cancer when he was 17, a sister to a drunk driver when she was 25, and both my parents in their 60’s to cancer. And I am still smiling
• Knowing that I am living my passion and my purpose, and with a smile.
• rebelling against what my mother wants me to do. ha ha. just kidding.
• When I can end my day knowing I did the best that I could.
• Peace of mind/ nice family union/be truly yourself and be happy with it/ be passionate about life, pushing the limits and achieving the results you look for with love, honesty, compassion and generosity .
• It’s subjective for self prosperity, at the same time it’s objective for public eyes. Generally, make more than wasting more:)
• doing something worth celebrating.
• My grade point average this semester! yippee!
• Bringing meaning into other people’s live.
• when I have succeeded at achieving a goal, sometimes no matter how small. Achieving goals makes me happy, therefore success is ultimately defined by happiness!!
• Achieving my goals.

Comment on this question:

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

Below are your answers to the question:  If you were to take yourself out on a date, where would you go?

Here’s to Celebrating YOU this Valentine’s Day…

• Definitely to a spa.
• I go to the opera!
• a spa in Sedona, Arizona. PS – I ltake myself on local dates regularly and LOVE it!
• A incredible dinner near the ocean at sunset and a walk on the beach after with a vanilla latte in hand, loving the fresh air and ocean!! Maybe a movie after and then home by a fire!! Man!! I need to do that!!!
• Out to dinner where I’ve never been before and then go to the Chabot Observatory…capping off the evening with some star gazing and hot chocolate!
• Georgia Aquarium!
• a long drive in the country…..picnic by the river…
• Depends on my mood… either: camping; urban hiking; library; museum; outdoor concert; carnival; dinner; fair; …etc.
• fantasy-wise : Venice, Italy on one of those gondola rides w/hubby John . But reality-wise and more in tune with my budget – dinner at Red lobster and a movie! : ) (actually even Red lobster is stretching my budget alittle – lol!)
• the mental hospital
• to a nice quite romantic restaurant.
• Camping.
• Just hold’n the hand of my girl would be fine enough.
• A spa day, trip to the beach, & Cirque du Soleil!
• Going to Monterey for the day and enjoying the fresh ocean air …
• Badger or pinemarten watching lol
• A concert….with my hubby!!
• I’d put the top down on my car on a warm sunny day, drive to the beach, buy a sandwich and a cold beer, kick off my shoes, lay in the sand, smell the ocean, listen to the waves, close my eyes, and stay there all day. Wow, I can almost taste it. Thanks!
• I took my gal out to dinner last night and we had great time!
• Italy, at a small cafe in the village of Montepulciano drinking their house red wine & eating Pici!
• A spa, massage included ofcourse, light dinner and jump in bed early with my man to continue relaxing.
• Easy – out on a moonlight horseback trail ride during the full moon.
• A long walk with the dog then if still engaged perhaps a glass of wine somewhere. Simple and conversation focused.
• What’s a date???
• SPA DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Start with a Nature Hike, followed by a hot shower, steam room, Facial and of course a Message…. You know, just another day LOL
• I would make a fun dinner at home with wine and movies and just cuddle on the couch.
• A nice deep massage : )
• To a salsa dance club and then a spa to work out all of the dance-induced kinks.
• a lazy day where the scenery and air is pleasing , with someone who induces tranquility and happiness in my life.

Comment on this question:

When is the last time you took YOU out on a date?

Here are your responses to the question, “If you could wave a magic wand, what would you wish for?”

• my own home instead of living with my parents at 45…
• and wisdom of how to start my life again….
• World peace and an end to hunger, poverty, oppression and social injustice!
• restful sleep. If I could sleep, my possibilities would be endless.
• equality for all…
• For everyone to live a conscience life, living in the now.
• Chocolate!
• your friendly and sweet smile (awe, thanks.)
• A quiet, uninterrupted month so I could finish writing my book…a house on a lake would be nice…but I am not really picky.
• A day between each day, and non-linear time Plus cleaning elves.
• Sure I’d wish a more powerful magic wand! Lol! Well, seriiously, I’d wish to be a “heart-healer” Life Coach.
• A cure for DSRCT (cancer) or to have my brother back living a healthy and happy life.
• Turn back time…and heal my past wounds…and take more chances, risks and find my voice. Have an endless supply of time and money…so I can do whatever my heart fancies.
• More time to learn the art of letting go, I would wish for a peaceful heart.
• I too lost my brother to cancer. I would give my right arm to have him back….healthy and happy ~
• For the doctors to be able to stop all the problems that are going with my husband. After surviving Leukemia, making it through a cord blood transplant, and cheating death a few times over the last four years. I just wish he could not be in pain and our family could have our life back.
• The end of cancer would be a good start, especially in children.
• Peace through One Global Heart
• to have a little more time at home…
• Wisdom!
• A great life for my son, Max.
• All my bills paid off & enough $$$ to live comfortably.
• world peace. and i’m not being cheeky…
• the cure to Autism for my son
• everyone to always tell the truth
• Financial security
• World peace
• A restoration of my youngest sons emotional and mental health!
• To start and run a non profit for the benefit of educating families and individuals in my community about proper nutrition and to provide healthy free of charge meals to people in need. All while earning or having enough resources to maintain my own family.
• Even though the process is part of the fun, I would like to have my business up and running to help families with eldercare issues. Guess I better get moving! (Note from Susan – Learn more about this wish here: http://www.theshiftingpath.com)
• An insanely large amount of cash right now, and a continual independent income stream thereafter. Money buys security, care, and the things that make you and your family&friends happy.
• safe places to live for all children and elders
• some peace and fortune for the poor people of Haiti.
• World peace! Cure Cancer! I could go on and on~How long do I get to hold that magic wand?!
• All the right answers to my 6 year old’s questions…that will help him
• a cure for Huntington’s Disease
• Right now, I would wish for the people of Haiti..rebuilding, finding their lost loved ones..a new beginning for them
• Shelter, food, and love for all.
• World peace and all the benefits that go with it, for all……

Comment on this question:

How does knowing what you really, really want inspire you?

World peace and an end to hunger, poverty, oppression and social injustice!World peace and an end to hunger, poverty, oppression and social injustice!
restful sleep. If I could sleep, my possibilities would be endless.
equality for all…
For everyone to live a conscience life, living in the now.
Chocolate!
your friendly and sweet smile (awe, thanks.)
A quiet, uninteruppted month so I could finish writing my book…a house on a lake would be nice…but I am not really picky.
A day between each day, and non-linear time Plus cleaning elves.
Sure I’d wish a more powerful magic wand! Lol! Well, seriiously, I’d wish to be a “heart-healer” Life Coach.
A cure for DSRCT (cancer) or to have my brother back living a healthy and happy life.
Turn back time…and heal my past wounds…and take more chances, risks and find my voice. Have an endless supply of time and money…so I can do whatever my heart fancies.
More time to learn the art of letting go, I would wish for a peaceful heart.
I too lost my brother to cancer. I would give my right arm to have him back….healthy and happy ~
For the doctors to be able to stop all the problems that are going with my husband. After surviving Leukemia, making it through a cord blood transplant, and cheating death a few times over the last four years. I just wish he could not be in pain and our family could have our life back.
The end of cancer would be a good start, especially in children.
Peace through One Global Heart
to have a little more time at home…
Wisdom!
my own home instead of living with my parents at 45…

Here are your responses to the question: Are you too busy, too tired or too bored to work out?

• I do tell myself these things…
• Today too tired…
• all three
• i was there….today …. not yesterday ….but today
• too tired but I know its because I have been stressed and a little depressed.
• Too busy.
• I was inspired by the beautiful snow so took a couple of very invigorating – and COLD – walks in the woods during the last couple of days – great cardio w/ wonderful beauty!
• Hi Anne M. that is what I did yesterday, it was great! (referring to above)
• Yep!
• Too busy (but I do walk the woof every day)
• none of the above-it’s just too important for me to make any excuses for not working out!
• yes!
• Too busy! And too poor really…
• at this very moment, all 3 apply
• too tired, and body is too stuffed from injuries.
• A little bit of the first two, but I’m doing better with the Wii Fit I got for Christmas and my birthday.
• Yes, yes, and…yes.
• The first two. Though mostly it’s that when you have kids, it becomes a big production just to take 20 minutes for a workout…
• all three
• Are those my only options?
• how about unmotivated
• unmotivated
• I know when it si my time of month, & the cramps are bad, I am in too much pain to work out sometimes.
• a and b, not c
• I WAS too busy, then decided to do it anyway, so I’m at the gym every a.m.!

Comment on this question:

What are the benefits of working out regularly?