Stress is a fact of life and it not only negatively effects our health, it can also be a relationship killer. Within our fast pace cultures, it’s unrealistic to try to avoid stress completely. Yet, what we do with our stress can make all the difference. When we are stressed out we generally become irritable, short tempered and we often shutdown or isolate ourselves, sending confusing messages to the people we love. This can cause great harm to our relationships, and especially to our most intimate relationship… the one with our spouse or life partner.

You may not always be able to leave your work pressures at the office, let go of a busy day managing kids, or keep your other anxieties at bay, yet you really can use stress to your advantage and turn it into something that creates a strong bond that brings you together versus pushes you apart.

Here are five ways you can get to stressing less and kissing more…

• Communication – Use what stresses you out as a way to allow your partner to get to know you. While also sharing the good things that you love and enjoy, open up to them and share your hurts and frustrations. Allow what stresses you out to bring you closer to your partner by using it to create intimacy and understanding.

• Partnership – When people we love are hurting it naturally triggers the desire within us to protect.  We want to help that person, take away their pain and nurture them. Use your stress to bring partnership into your relationship. Brainstorm solutions to what troubles you, allow your partner to help and support you.

• Affection - Physical contact is a great stress reducer! Hugging someone you love, holding another persons hand or snuggling up on the sofa helps to slow our breathing and reduce physical tension. Use stress to your advantage in your relationship by using physical contact as a way to chill out.

• Romance - Use feeling stressed as an excuse to enjoy lots of romance! Schedule romantic getaways now and then. Pamper one another and enjoy sexual intimacy together. Instead of saying, “not tonight” because you are stressed, use sex as a way to de-stress! Enjoy each other’s warmth and touch, giggles and smiles.

• Innovation - Stressful times can lead to incredible innovation and creativity. Talk with your partner about what consistently stresses you out and together identify solutions. Perhaps you can agree on a lifestyle change or a simple routine you can put into place. With innovation and creativity comes healthy pride… a sense of accomplishment the two of you can share from working together as a team to resolve your troubles.

And remember… partners who play together, stay together. During stressful times it is utterly important to have some fun and play! Tickle one another, have a pillow fight together or simply laugh together as you watch a silly movie. Don’t allow stress to push you apart but instead use it as a catalyst that glues you together.

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How Can You Use Stress as Your Relationship Glue?!